Fatherless Daughter

Fatherless daughter

 

Fatherless Daughter,

Do you ever wonder what he looks like?

Do you ever wonder what color his eyes are;

and how he smiles when he’s happy?

Do you ever dream of meeting him and being a part of his life?

Do you dream of being reunited with a man that you never really knew?

Do you ever wonder if things would have turned out differently given he was in the picture?

Maybe mom would’ve been happier, maybe she would have given you more attention.

She told you he was the only man she ever loved.

Do you wonder what he smells like;

if he really has a tattoo of your name and if you’ll ever witness it;

and if he’s doing okay out there, wherever he is?

Do you ever wonder if he could’ve been part of your life;

to hold you when that boy broke your heart;

to dance with you in the living room and someday give you away?

Do you ever think about the possibilities of running into him every time you’re in town?

You keep your eyes open for a man who resembles you.

Do you wonder if it’s even possible at this point

to have a relationship with a man you’ve not seen in years?

Do you ever just sit and think about the time he gave you that teddy bear,

tears just streaming down his face?

You were so young you didn’t understand.

Still yet, he smiled at you through the tears, trying to leave a good memory of himself

because that was the only memory you’d ever have of him.

Do you ever wonder if when everyone else walked out if he would’ve stuck around;

If as your father he would have loved you when you were being unlovable and

suffered with you through the pain.

Do you ever wonder if you would have turned out different, given a different circumstance;

that if she would’ve allowed it, he could’ve been in the picture.

Do you ever stop and think if he would’ve stuck around even then?

Do you ever wonder if he will meet your husband someday;

or meet his granddaughter for the very first time.

She said you cried when you heard you were a grandpa.

I really wish you were here.

I’m thankful for the men who have been in my life,

But I always wanted to be someone’s little girl.

I’ve forgiven you, time and time again.

I got the messages where you said you loved me.

I’ve dreamed about it more nights than you’ll ever know,

what it would’ve been like, to know you, my father.

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