As young as I am, I have thought about this for the longest time. You become obsessed with finding someone to the point where you don’t even enjoy going out anymore, because you to busy looking for ‘him’ looking for you, looking for ‘him’. It basically plagues your mind.
When will God send him? Is he thinking about me? Praying for me? The thought of this part of my life not being fulfilled was a scary reality, one I did not want to anticipate as if it was up to me.
As I began deeper introspection, I realized that I was genuinely unhappy and it was not because I was single or because I was particularly frustrated with life in general, but I was unsatisfied with my relationship with God and it was not His fault, it was mine.
I took my salvation for granted.
I was saved. This was a fact, but do I really know what this means? Do I understand that Christ saved me from an eternity without Him and my salvation is an absolute gift? In the middle of my ‘selfishness’, I had lost track of what it meant to be saved. Discovering this about myself, hurt. If hurt made me this way, I shiver to think what it must have felt like to my Savior.
I needed to get back to a place where I reflected on what He has done for me, not only in times like this but daily. I needed to get back to understanding that my salvation was a gift, not a privilege. I have done nothing to earn His love.
Our relationships was in trouble,
and only I could make the choice to save it. Truth is, He never left. I became so obsessed with finding someone, but I had someone. In fact, I had the most important relationship in the world. I had a relationship with Christ. The one person who could fulfill me.
Now, I’m not saying that God doesn’t desire for us to have a partner. I’m saying that we need to be more than okay with ‘just’ God. Anything else that we receive from His hands is a gift.
Does the word not echo this? “every good and perfect gift comes from above coming down from the Father of lights” (James 1:17).
Are we that satisfied enough with Christ that we are willing to die to our own desires and become totally content with having Him as the center of our lives? Or has our singleness become such an overwhelming part of our lives, that we serve God because of what He can do for us and not because HE IS GOD.
Our terms and conditions for service are not pleasing to HIM. He knows us best, loves us best and understands what we need best. To each of us a different calling, gift, and anointing has been allocated. God has given us a special grace to deal with each of them. Ask yourself this question:
“…And if He really calls me to a life of singleness will I be okay?”
Tatum-Lee is a Born Again Christian, qualified Writer and Content producer who resides in Cape Town, South Africa. She runs her own Blog Ministry and uses this platform to share the Goodness of the Lord with the world. Follow Tatum-Lee on Facebook, Twitter, and Instagram